Turning my volume Backwards to her

from listening to David DeAngelo's deeply psychological lecture "Power Sexuality"


This clearly reflects my life's biggest problem. Explains why I feel much less fear approaching women, people (even projects), but much more fear continuing the interaction (or work).

Surprisingly it seems I have this pattern in common with many men [= an opposed way to the rather female "volume control" which starts with minimal intention/attraction and turns to maximal intention/attraction, not realizing she often functions different than me]. Thought I was in some way unique with this backward process:



"The more involved you get, the more likely the next phase is. Most guys fear that the next step involves more risk. It doesn't. The next step involves progressively less and less risk. And it makes the sexual act more likely. This is the key.

As men we feel that the stakes are getting higher and higher as we get more and more intimate with a woman. And we don't wanna make mistakes, so we become more apprehensive and less true of ourselves, right up to the end. It's almost like we're driving very very fast, as fast as we can, and the closer we get the slower we go. Until right before we get to the finish line, we get right there and we go : "I just can't do it".

The fact that you don't do it is what make the stakes go up and makes you lose more and more. Reality is that the further you get and the more you just push right through it - when you really engage that masculine energy, that sexual threat - the more the risk goes down and the more likely things become."









wWw